THE first tip in the 31 days to becoming a better dad is to be good to your child's mom.

As someone who has gone through some extreme ups and downs with his child's mom, I can attest to the power of taking the high road. In fact, our relationship is the inspiration for this blog. I have made many mistakes as a father myself, but I have grown dramatically over the 11 years of my oldest daughter's life.

I can't say the same for her. Sadly, she has chosen to use the lack of having her own father in her life as an excuse to remain stagnant. Sometimes I think that's what she wants for our daughter, but I won't let it happen. Instead, I've been proactive in gaining custody and playing the largest role possible.

Through it all, I never have a bad word to say about her and I remind our girls to always love and respect their mother. I even go so far as to take her out for Mother's Day and give the kids presents to give her for other holidays. As a result, the past stays in the past and the kids can live life without worrying about mommy and daddy hurting each other. As they get older, your kids will see for themselves the sacrifices you've made to be the bigger person and repay you with their love and loyalty.

Remember, no child should have to choose between their parents. As men, we often get the short end of the stick, but by being good to your child's mother, your kids will see that you put them first.

That's what being a good dad is all about.

DAD TALK

* Do you find it difficult to be good to your children's mom?
* If so, what are some things you can do to improve relations with her?
* Did your dad have a good relationship with your mom?
* Do you think there is a correlation between your parents relationship and your relationship with your child's mom?